Today, I felt the pain of rejection and it was hard. I know it's hard for everybody. But there are actually days that I forget that rejection and pain are hard. You know what I mean by hard--heavy heart, frowney face, teary eyes. Just plain hard. Sometimes I think that being committed to seeking integrity and service should be some kind of get-out-of-jail-free card for the feelings that pull me down.
And then I'm reminded...being self-aware, surrounded by support and committed to growth doesn't make pain go away. It just gives me more choices on how to respond to the pain.
Here are some choices I made in response to the pain I feel today:
1) Talked with some supportive, encouraging friends
2) Wrote about the ways certain choices I made helped contribute to things not working out the way I wanted and then read this writing to a friend. (This was painful but liberating. It soothed the little girl inside me and got me more focused on how to grow.)
3) Got some good work done. (Funny how when I attend to business I've been putting off, strains on the heart tend to soften.)
4) Made delicious, healthy meals
5) Took a really luxurious nap
Here are some things I chose NOT to do:
1) Hide from my feelings
2) Eat unhealthy food
3) Call unsupportive people
4) Argue with the person I felt rejected by
All in all, a beautiful day. Not because life was easy today. It was not. But because I chose to treat myself with love and make choices from grace and dignity.
Wow, I can honestly say I'm deeply grateful for today.
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